Defining "Family"

There is a lot of talk in politico-religious news bulimia feasts about the definition of the family.  Almost all of the time I hear this from Christians.  Almost all of the time it is to show that homosexuality is not a viable option for Christian families, only one husband and one wife is.  Any time there is any sort of heated argument it seems that we push our idea as the idea of the Bible, instead of letting the Bible speak its own idea.  So I wanted first to offer some ways to define the Christian family, and then to share what I believe is THE definition of the Christian family, and also share why this is important this very hour and day.  The first instance of a Biblical family is Adam and Eve, one man and one woman, and this family is referred to by Jesus in Scripture (Matthew 19:4-5; Mark 10:6-8; ).  Another family is the polygamous family, with one husband having more than one wife.  Examples of this are Lamech, Adah, and Zillah; Abraham, Sarah and Hagar;  Jacob, Leah, Rachel, Bilhah, and Zilpah; David and his many wives, and Solomon and his 700+300.  There are many variations of the polygamous relationship, such as being a wife, a sister, a concubine, or a slave turned wife.  Many combinations are possible and many combinations are described.  There is also an interesting example of polyandry with Maacah the daughter of Abishalom bearing the Solomon’s son Rehoboam, and also bearing Rehoboam’s son Asa.  This incestual family is the one Jesus comes from.   There are many other examples of families that are not one man and one woman, such as Lot and his daughters, Hosea and Gomer and Gomer’s other men, Daniel and no wife, the Samaritan woman and her five husbands + current man, Jesus and no wife, and the list goes ever on.  So does the Bible push the idea of one man and one woman?  In a way you could say it does, but to push this idea of one man and one woman I think could make us miss THE definition of the Christian family.     

“(Jesus), your mother and your brothers are outside, seeking you” (Mark 3:32).  They were referring Jesus to his family, even though the family they were referring him was one woman and no husband (There was no mention of Joseph – maybe he died, maybe not).  I wonder how many would object that Joseph could not have left Mary because Joseph was a righteous man and people back then just didn’t do that.  Honestly, I would not be shocked if Joseph left Mary.  Jesus needed to come save us all, even his dad, even his mom. 

Jesus responds with a question, “Who are my mother and my brothers?”  Jesus then goes on toward a new definition of “family.”  Family is summed up in the first two words of the Lord’s prayer: “Our Father. . .”  THE definition of the Christian family is nothing less than those who are the children of the living God.  Our relation to the family of God is actually more defining than how we relate to our own family.  For instance, what if all of my family died, my wife, kids, brother, father, etc.  Would I have no family?  Not according to Jesus.  Jesus rewrites the definition of Family.  A Christian family is those who are God’s children.  The widow has a family if she is a follower of Jesus.  A Christian is by definition in a family, even if he or she is single and his or her parents are gone.

Here is the Christian family idea:  make sure your kids know what family they belong to, that they have a Father who is in heaven.  My son knows he has two fathers.  When you ask my kids if so and so is a member of our family, they think on two levels, because if someone is a believer in Jesus Christ, they are a part of our family.  Maybe you are reading this and you have no “biological” or “nuclear” family.  Jesus invites us all to be a part of his family, his Father’s house.  Which family takes precedence?  I hope the answer is obvious.  This does not mean the pastor spends every hour at Church and neglects his or her spouse and kids.  What it does mean is that the name Smith will soon be forgotten and not used again, but that the name of Jesus will go ever on, and only through his blood are our family members made.